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I think it’s the same for many children of immigrants in the UK - who cherish having a comforting group of friends that they can turn to when they feel jaded by judgement and anxious about divulging personal opinions in a space where they may not be welcomed.
Today’s British Asian Muslim women are met with a three-pronged pitchfork of prejudice: the intersectional abrasions of racism, sexism and religious discrimination are enough to make anyone run for the hills and hunker down with a pair of heavy duty earplugs.
I doubt she will learn Urdu from me but I still want Islam to be a part of her life because it's a massive part of mine.
I want her to feel comfortable making friends but at the same time be confident enough not to hide her own opinions about faith and Islam.
Or feeling embarrassed when friends tell me I’m no fun because I choose not to drink.
Once my exam results were mixed up with the only other Asian girl in my class at university and I was told I had failed, when in fact, she had.
I’ve been horrified by someone throwing a strange liquid on me from a passing car as I walked down the street, forcing me to rush home and shower.
And I’ve felt pushed into a corner to discuss arranged marriage and virginity in work environments by men who felt they could ask me about my sex life just because I am a Muslim woman.
Many Muslim women even feel apprehensive about revealing their personal identity, which means the onus is on others to make them feel welcomed and included so that they can feel comfortable enough to share.
So when my personal space is about to be encroached on, I choose to retreat before attack, which isn't doing me any favours.
Being bad at maintaining friendships is not something that I’m over the moon about.
Just like the fat kid at school who was the last one to be picked for the rounders’ team and never caught the ball, despite having her hands outstretched for the duration of play. Quiet judgement still exists and it’s hard to be open, honest and truly yourself when you’re faced with ridicule, misinterpretation, anger and sometimes, even just blind curiosity from others.
I hate to admit this but it's just easier to be friends with people who share your beliefs and your skin colour.
As unthinkable as it seems there’s a tiny speck of me that understands why one in seven of the British jihadists who have gone to Iraq and Syria are women.